What Dads REALLY Want for Father’s Day
Over the years I have received many wonderful gifts from my wife and children for Father’s Day. I have no complaints, really, except what I truly want for Father’s Day – what every Red Blooded All-American Dad wants this Sunday -- is for football season to start.
Let’s face it, what better gift could any Dad ask for then a full day of NFL action? Maybe a full day of football while the wife gets Starbucks coffee and the kids staff the BBQ…..
So, Dads and people who love their Dad, here’s the plan: Let’s get the NFL to add 6 weeks and 5 more games to the season. Dump pre-season; it sucks. They have NFL Europe for off-season training. Pre-season is a waste of time, and by dropping it and adding 5 real games, the net increase in games played is only 1. Give every team 2 bye-weeks during the season so the players get some extra rest to keep the play sharp, expand the team player limit by 12 guys and up the team salary cap by $12 million each, and PRESTO, we have a season that has 21 games over 23 weeks. Start the expanded NFL season on Father’s Day, which preserves the January Playoff tradition, and every Dad gets his Dream Day.
Add this blog to your blog or web site. Write your Congressperson. This is the best idea since fatherhood and if we all squeal loudly we might get what we all want. More NFL football.
Have your checkbook handy?
I need you to write a check. Well, okay, actually President Bush needs you to write a check. It’s only $1,180. Each.
If you happen to be a poor person, or retired and livingon a fixed income, I am sure he will take payments. Actually, that’s a lie. People who are poor or retired or very rich don’t have to pay the $1,180. Children under 18 and students are also exempt.
That’s a good deal, right? Well, yeah, if you fall into one of those categories. For most Americans, everyone in the vast, and vastly abused, middle class, the amount of the check just went up. Since nearly half of all Americans are exempt, the rest of us working stiffs get to pay double.
So, pony up, folks. That’s $2,360 each, made payable to: President’s Bush’s War to Bring Democracy to a Bunch of People in Iraq Who Could Care Less.
So far we have spent $350 billion tax dollars to give the gift of democracy to Iraq and Afghanistan. Another $45 billion is in the Congressional pipeline.
Just so we are clear here, if you are a middle-class worker, and Congress authorizes the additional $45 billion, you get to write a second check – need the name again of who to make that payable to?
But, never fear, hard working taxpayer. Mr. Bush has proposed reducing other things in the federal budget to help pay for the war. He has asked Congress for $7 billion in cuts in such unimportant programs as law enforcement, educating our children, health programs, Amtrak, college grants, fire assistance, and rural development. Believing our boarders are secure, he has proposed a cut in funding for the boarder patrol and immigration services. Believing that poor people are plenty warm, Mr. Bush has asked Congress to stop wasting money helping elderly and poor people pay for heating.
Mr. Bush’s has also lobbied for new taxes. Bush wants to charge veterans $250 to enroll in the Veterans Affairs health care program. He also wants to charge veterans higher fees for medical services. And, among other new taxes and fees that he wants us to pay, he has asked Congress to raise the taxes paid by airline passengers. Obviously the airline industry is financially healthy enough to raise their rates again and this time, give the money to the government – at least President Bush believes this.
At this point Congress has resisted Mr. Bush’s attempts to get foreign aid funding increased. I am forced to admit here that I have to agree with Bush on this one. Why in the world would we want to spend our tax dollars on all the wasteful programs noted above when we can give that money away to pad the bank accounts of corrupt dictators and governments all over the planet?
So, if you think President Bush is doing a good job, then send that check right away.
The rest of us working folks will hunker down and try to survive the next 3 years as Mr. Bush takes the country, and all of us, to the poor house. And, thanks to Mr. Bush, it is now much harder to file for bankruptcy, so dig deep, America, ‘cause you can’t avoid paying for President’s Bush’s War to Bring Democracy to a Bunch of People in Iraq Who Could Care Less.